THE holidays are a romantic time of the year.
But as most of us in relationships know, romance can be stressful. Or at least, the prep work that goes into it can be.
And as much as we all like to think "Love don't cost a thing," (I'm sure that's why you dated P. Diddy, J-Lo), the truth is, there's nothing more disappointing than a crappy gift from your significant other.
To prevent this from happening, I believe in getting real about expectations, and having a frank discussion about price point.
You may think that's pretty un-romantic of me. So let me share a little memory from my Christmas vault that might convince you.
Last year was my and my boyfriend's first holiday together. Awww.
Because we had only gotten together in the summer, I was excited to splurge on Christmas presents. As it turns out, I may have been a little bit too gung-ho.
Like any smart girlfriend, I started out by spying on his emails - only the ones from clothing and shoe companies, I swear - and figured out which pair of sneakers he wanted.
Then, in mid-November, I forked over nearly $200 and stashed them away.
Then I blabbed to him about it. I didn't say what I had gotten, just a mere "I got you something really cool."
As the ladies will know, this was code for "I expect you to get me something really cool too."
After a few more weeks and no obvious sign of him shopping, he suddenly sprung into action. You see, my cheapo headphones had broken once again and I made the mistake of complaining about it out loud.
"Don't get new ones," my boyfriend told me, in what he thought was a sly voice.
"Why? Are you thinking of getting me headphones for Christmas? Don't," I replied.
He shook his head no and we left it at that.
A few days later, my other half informed me that he was hitting the stores and he wanted ideas on what to get me. I told him that I'd be happy with whatever he decided. In reality, I was hoping he'd pick up on the hints I was dropping about needing a new jacket or fleece-lined boots.
Long story short, Christmas morning rolled around and I got . . . a new pair of headphones. They broke a week later (not joking) and the store refused to exchange them.
If I had to do it all over again, and I kind of do this year, I'd keep these tips in mind:
1. Guys don't pick up on hints. If you have something specific in mind, either tell them about it or get one of your friends to.
2. Don't expect an awesome present if your beloved hasn't had a job in more than six months. As was the case last year.
3. Talk about a ballpark price point that you're both comfortable with. You might want to buy him that new bicycle, but it could get pretty awkward if all you wind up with in return is a pair of mittens.
4. Don't make a big scene if you wind up with something that doesn't make the grade. It's super unattractive. Find more passive aggressive ways to deal with your anger.
Happy holidays!
