It's a conversation that everyone needs to have.
So says Jane Langton, a sexual health educator, who leads a new and unique program at Silver Harbour Seniors Activity Centre called The Chat Room: Conversations About Life, Intimacy, and Sexual Health.
"We are sexual beings from birth to death. We all need the information," says Langton. Every Friday, seniors are invited to attend The Chat Room and join the conversation. The sessions have so far included participants in their late 50s to late 80s, says Langton.
"It's going really well," she says of the group so far. "It's incredible the conversations we have."
Participants do not have to register, they simply show up. The cost is a suggested donation of $4. Langton says some attendees don't speak the first time they attend but
soon become comfortable enough to join in.
"I'm open to it going exactly where it needs to go. I have a loose agenda, I have topics that I like to cover each week, but it's more of a conversation," says Langton.
Some recurring themes so far have been what dating looks like in later years, especially for those who are newly divorced or newly widowed, as well as how to stay safe, and info about STIs (sexually transmitted infections). Langton explains that some of the participants are coming out of long-term relationships and don't have the information they need about STIs and how to protect themselves.
"Ultimately I always bring it back to (the fact that) you go to your doctor and enquire about your general health, but your sexual health is equally as important."
Reconnecting as a couple in later years is also a popular topic. Langton says after many years together as a couple and raising children, many empty-nesters find they are somewhat disconnected from each other when it comes to intimacy. "And it truly takes a lot of courage to be the one that's vulnerable and to say how are we going to get this back again because it's really worth it," she says.
Langton has led similar conversations with adults of all ages, and says when talking to seniors the discussion often focuses more on intimacy, and intimacy will mean different things to different people. It just might mean someone to hold hands with, notes Langton. Intimacy is not just about sex. It could also just mean someone to have a conversation with.
"For many it's just touch. As we get older we don't have access to touch and it's amazing, we know that as babies and infants touch is so valuable. Why do we think it becomes less important as we get older?" says Langton, adding that intimacy is "good for our hearts, it's good for our overall well-being, it's good for anxiety, depression. It affects every aspect of our life."
She continues: "The people who are seeking this information they will have a long and healthy intimate life and it will lengthen their life ultimately I believe."The Chat Room is currently on a short break for a couple of weeks.
For more information contact the seniors centre or Langton at [email protected].
