ASK any parent and they will verify that the hour before dinner can be the most difficult time of the day.
It is known as the "arsenic hour" and I know that if we could figure out a way to put all the kids in stasis until the meal is on the table life would be much, much easier.
What is going on? Well, it's a transition time. Parents are just home from work and changing their focus from the work environment to the home. The kids are demanding attention, everyone is hungry, and it's hard to summon the energy to put a meal on the table. The day is coming to a close and evening is upon us.
One parent told me she had the perfect solution to this problem. My ears perked up and I asked for her secret. "Grandmother," she answered.
She explained that when Grandmother was visiting she would sit the kids down and read to them while dinner was being prepared.
That is clearly not going to work for all of us. So what can parents do to make this time pleasant for all?
When you get home from work, focus on the kids right away. Take the time to listen to their tales about their day, to give them the hugs they crave and play with them for a short while. If the kids are really hungry, give them a snack. It seems strange to feed them right before dinner, but they are hungry now. Waiting for food is not a skill most kids have.
The good news is that the very child who will not touch veggies at dinner will eat and enjoy a mix of raw veggies with a yogurt dip while you prepare dinner. Have the veggies cut and ready in the fridge and it will just take a minute to serve this special appie.
I have heard of parents who cook dinner after the kids are in bed. What they are doing is preparing tomorrow's meal tonight. That way dinner is on the table quickly, everyone eats and it's a pleasant time. Then after the kids are settled parents can prepare food at their leisure. This wouldn't work for everyone but the point is to think outside the box and control the arsenic hour.
Bring the kids into the kitchen to help you with the meal preparation. I know that having a child in the kitchen doesn't make for a more efficient process but if they are going to bother and interrupt you while you try to cook dinner why not simply involve them? They love it. Think of some tasks they can take on. Kids can fetch and carry, rip lettuce or stir dry ingredients.
This way they are getting the attention they crave and you are able to get on with the task of cooking dinner. The bonus is that they are actually learning how to cook and in a few years will be very helpful.
Another strategy is to have a box of special toys that only come out when you are cooking. They get to use the special coloured pencils, do puzzles or play with paper dolls while you cook. They will be engaged and happy and keen to have you busy with the meal preparation.
This may be when you allow screen time. Whether it's an electronic game, the web, a CD or the TV; if it's only permitted while you cook they will be happy to be entertained.
The arsenic hour happens every single day so it's worth planning some strategies to make it a happy and pleasant time for all family members.
Kathy Lynn is a professional speaker and author of Who's In Charge Anyway? and But Nobody Told Me I'd Ever Have to Leave Home. To read more, sign up for her informational newsletter at parentingtoday.ca.
