GOSH, I sure feel a great deal of empathy for dog owners these days, especially the new ones who have been immersed in the current, yet chronic, epidemic of the anthropomorphizing of dogs.
With television, movies, social and print media continually portraying dogs as insufferably playful, happy and adorably cute companions, the majority of dog owners assume that dogs are simply born your BFF (best friend forever). So when their newly acquired charge doesn't behave like the dogs in YouTube videos or viral photos, they are mystified and downright confused as to what a dog is, or rather, what their dog is.
So what is a dog? A dog is a predatory animal that evolved from a wolf through selective breeding by humans over a period of 12,000 years or so. The smallest of teacup Chihuahuas to the largest of mastiffs all came from the same ancestor, the wolf.
Outwardly, the majority of dog breeds and mixes bear little resemblance to the wolf. Through evolutionary domestication, many of the wolves' predatory instincts have been channeled into useful tools for assisting humans, such as a border collie's desire to herd, a pointer's desire to hunt, a retriever's desire to bring prey back to the den, and a Doberman's desire to guard.
Dogs also have another strong instinct and that is the desire to have a leader within the pack. When a dog does not have a proper leader, it becomes an improper dog.or a bad dog!
What is a leader? To use a wonderfully politically incorrect word, it means a boss. Your dog needs a boss and you need to be the boss of your dog.
I know that is hard to hear, let alone understand, when all we hear is how dogs are our friends and we are in a "relationship" with our dogs.
To further complicate things, as humans, we consider our friends and spouses equals - no bossing required.
In every healthy relationship, fair boundaries of proper conduct are set between the individuals. When one member of the relationship chooses to disrespect their spouse or friend and ignore those boundaries, trouble arises.
Dogs set boundaries with each other and also form friendships with other dogs.
This is evident at dog parks when a group of dogs are playing. As long as all of the dogs agree on a particular style of play, be it wrestling or chasing, and respect the rules, dogs play very nicely together. They set the boundaries or rules of play by carefully observing and being aware of each other.
A little yelp when a tooth accidentally grazes an ear means cool it. When one dog ignores the rules and gets too rough, or tries to play with a group of dogs uninvited, conflict often arises. The conflict arises because one dog disrespected the boundaries set by another dog and the offending behaviour has to be dealt with immediately to prevent escalation or reoccurrence. As humans, we get upset with this. We yell at other dog owners for having an aggressive dog, but the conflict is normally nothing more than a lot of noise and spit. In some cases there could be a degree of aggression, but I would bet that the dog that didn't respect the other dog's rules probably doesn't have leadership at home. It therefore chooses to do as it pleases, because consequences are not a part of its life.
Regardless of whether you see your dog as your friend or your subordinate, boundaries and limitations are still required to maintain a mutually healthy relationship.
Joan Klucha has been working with dogs for over 15 years in obedience, tracking and behavioural rehabilitation. Contact her at k9kinship.com.
