DIVORCE is often a stressful and ugly time, but one West Vancouver lawyer is encouraging couples to look beyond the courtroom to potentially more respectful and cost-effective processes.
Deb Zutter specializes in mediation and collaborative law, two methods of dealing with separation and divorce that don't require the parties to air their dirty laundry inside the courtroom.
"Couples who do really well in mediation are people who are able to put their children first. They have to have a commitment to settling out of court, they need to be flexible and have a desire to treat each other with respect," says Zutter.
As a mediator, Zutter acts as a neutral person who provides legal information to both parties and helps them discuss major decisions - spousal support, division of assets, custody, and property settlements - in a "safe and confidential environment."
In a collaborative approach, each party has a lawyer and all four people work together to come to a resolution. But there are also other team members, such as coaches, child specialists and financial specialists, that are available to help a couple.
"The coach is a really wonderful addition because most people who are going through a divorce or separation are grieving the end of their marriage. That grief is an emotional event that involves denial, bargaining, anger, depression, ultimately acceptance," said Zutter, noting that coaches can help the couple move through this transition and can also help develop a parenting plan. Child specialists can also provide advice to the couple about how to be better parents.
Although in both mediation and collaborative law the goal is to reach an agreement as efficiently as possible, the time it takes for either process to complete varies from couple to couple, said Zutter.
"The things that cause it to vary are how emotional are each of the parties . . . (and) how many decisions need to be made," she said. "Some people have very few assets and no children. . . . Some couples have corporations and many properties so those take more time."
