Ask any parent and they will tell you that while the first of January may mark the official new year, September is the real new year.
Back to school with new classes, new friends, new teachers -- it goes on and on. And there is no end of advice for parents.
It all starts with a good night’s sleep. We know that lack of sleep in children can lead to learning and memory deficits. And this naturally enough can lead to poor academic performance.
All of which makes sense. Face it, when you’re tired you are just not alert. So, part of planning back to school is to consider how much sleep your kids need and how to help them settle down and have a good night’s sleep.
A consistent bedtime routine is something we think of with babies and toddlers but it’s equally important for our school-aged kids. Even adults benefit when bedtime has a routine and the body simply understands that it’s time to sleep.
Homework needs to be finished before bed. Then the routine starts and it can include a snack, a trip to the bathroom, a story, a cuddle and kiss from parents, and off to sleep.
After a good night’s sleep an organized morning can make all the difference for all family members.
Part of that can begin the night before. Have the kids lay out their clothing, pack their bag and either make lunch or have the makings chosen and ready to put together easily. Know what you are going to have for breakfast so you can quickly prepare the meal.
Start by giving yourself enough time to get ready for the day. Get up 15 minutes earlier than usual and you will find you will be less flustered and more focused on having a pleasant morning and easily make it out the door in plenty of time.
On the first day of school your kids will be somewhat anxious. For the little ones entering school for the first time can be traumatic. They may cry. It’s OK and normal and the teacher is used to it. Say goodbye, give them a hug and let them know that you trust they will be OK.
If you are confident that they will do just fine, they will believe that as well.
The irony is that it’s often more difficult for parents whose kids run into the kindergarten room without so much as a backward glance. Here you are, devastated that your baby is now in school, and there he is ready and willing to leave you standing there.
There are some kids who will be anxious because the past year was unpleasant. Reassure them that this is a new start; that they will be in a new class with a different teacher. But don’t dismiss their concerns. Let them know that it’s normal to be worried but that you know this year will be different.
At the end of the day let them tell you about their experiences in their own way. It’s tempting to bombard them with questions. After all, you have been wondering all day just how things are going. But an interrogation will just get shrugs and one-word responses.
The problem with questions is that the questioner is in charge of the conversation. When you question them, they need to tell you about their day based on what you ask.
So instead, simply let them know that you are happy to see them. Then stay quiet and they will likely start to tell you about their day. They can tell you what they want in whatever order matters to them.
With a little thought and planning this new year can be a positive experience for all.
Kathy Lynn is the author of Vive la Différence, Who’s In Charge Anyway? and But Nobody Told Me I’d Ever Have to Leave Home. If you want to read more, sign up for her informational newsletter at [email protected]
