Brandon wants to play hockey and he tells you his friends are also taking up karate this year.
And he and his pals have also discovered volleyball and are very keen on joining the team. Oh yes, he also announces that he want to learn how to play the guitar.
His sister, Amelia wants to take dance and gymnastics, play soccer and sing in the community choir. She is also going to be on student council this year.
It makes your head spin. How can you possibly coordinate all these activities for your kids? Do they need to do all this right now? Choosing extracurricular activities for your children can be a real challenge. Sometimes it seems that you spend your entire week in the car, ferrying kids from one activity to the other.
You want them to have all the wonderful experiences being offered but really, if you are all so frazzled, is it worth it? The trick is to create some sort of balance in our lives, those of our children and ourselves. And that means limiting the amount of time spent in extracurricular activities.
Kids need time for family, friends, activities, school, homework, and just relaxing. What does that mean? If you find that you never have a chance to sit down for dinner together, you barely talk to your kids except to verify scheduling plans and you have lost touch with them, you need to adjust your life.
Family is every bit as important as hockey or gymnastics so you need to ensure that there are times when you are together with some time on your hands. A relaxing meal together, a trip to the park or time to play a board game (I now it's oldfashioned but try it, it could be fun!) can be quality time for you as a family.
Children also need to spend time with friends. They do see them at school and at their activities but there should also be some unstructured time to allow for simply being together. They can go to the mall, throw a ball around in the backyard or play a video game together.
School is a given. They will be in school for a good part of each weekday and they will need to carve out some time for homework. Finally, they need some downtime. When every waking moment is spoken for, kids have no time to simply relax, to daydream or to read a great book.
So you need to help your children create some balance in their lives and that means making choices.
Determine how much time they can spend in extracurricular activities. A good rule of thumb is one team sport at a time, which will include games and practices. It's great to find a sport kids like because they learn so much. Besides learning how to play the particular game, they learn how to take turns, listen to the coach, work as part of a team and be a good loser and a gracious winner.
I generally recommend one other activity. This can be a hobby, a crafts activity or a volunteer commitment. So try for two for this semester and see how that goes.
Once you've set the parameters, let your kids choose the actual activities from the list.
They may have to make some hard choices, but being rested, having some life balance, and removing the stress of constantly rushing from one thing to another will be well worth it.
Kathy Lynn is a professional speaker and author of Who's In Charge Anyway? and But Nobody Told Me I'd Ever Have to Leave Home. If you want to read more, sign up for her informational newsletter at parentingtoday.ca.
